Everyone knows office romances are dangerous territory, but there's less consensus about office friendships.

It's only logical that if you spend most of your waking hours at work or are new to a city, your social life might revolve around the colleagues just a cubicle or two away. It can be a relief to talk about your boss from hell over drinks or dinner at the end of a busy day.

To a point, that can be healthy.

"If you didn't like the people at work, it would be hard to go to the job," says Lauren Osteen, 27, of Dallas, who met her best friend at the office. "In an environment where I'm going to spend 40 hours-plus a week, I want to have people around me who are going to be supportive and agree it's in the best interest of everyone that we get along."

That's true, say the experts, but they also warn that too much collegiality can backfire.

Flaunt your friendship too publicly, and people may think you're not serious about work or are neglecting your responsibilities. And beware the office pal who isn't looking out for your welfare: Will he repeat your nasty comments, or let the boss know what you think of your latest assignment?

A friend break up can also hurt your career — affecting your ability to work with a colleague, while making others in the office uncomfortable.

"So many things can result from how others perceive your relationships in the office and how you interact with your friends at the office," says Sally Horchow, co-author of "The Art of Friendship." "It's very easy to cross the line between what's appropriate and what's inappropriate."

So how to strike a balance? Here are some tips to help navigate office friendships:

APPEARANCES MATTER

It's one thing to have a friendly work environment. But people are less tolerant when their colleagues let their social lives take over the workplace or otherwise impede their work.

Osteen, who has lunch and takes break a few times a week with her friend, recalls being chided by her supervisor about "the need to monitor how much time you spend hanging out outside and getting your work done."

"The pros of having a best friend at work is that if anything makes you upset you have someone immediately to go to," she says. "The con is that you have a big distraction. It can kind of be like skipping class."

To avoid creating the wrong impression, save the bulk of your socializing for after hours rather than the watercooler.

AVOID CLIQUES

It's OK to have lunch together, but make sure your relationship doesn't make others feel left out. If you have to work together on a project, focus on the professional rather than the personal.

"Avoid conversations that exclude others or creates an impression of cliquishness," says Janie Fritz, co-editor of "Problematic Relationships in the Workplace."

Your boss is also likely to make assumptions about you and your office social circle. If hanging out with the office clown is your idea of fun, it may be hard to make your supervisor take your management aspirations seriously.

BEWARE OF FRENEMIES

"Sometimes when you make friends with someone you work in a competitive work environment, it's possible that they're making friends with you out of strategy. People have ulterior motives," Horchow says.

Don't get carried away badmouthing your boss or anyone else in the office, because you never know who else your "friend" is talking to.

Also, be realistic about the limits of your office friendship. Would that friend go to bat for you if your boss criticized you? Would you do the same? What would happen if you both decided to apply for the same promotion or wanted the same vacation week off and only one of you could have it?

STAY FLEXIBLE

Try not to take it too personally if an office friendship fizzles. Many work relationship are based on the situation, rather than any deeper-seated similarities. A new assignment or project may create new alliances and friendships.

Changes in job status can also affect friendships. If your best work friend gets promoted to manager, it will be difficult — if not impossible — to stay friends.

THIS IS NOT HIGH SCHOOL

Office friendships can be wonderful, and a few may even survive any job changes. But even the best of friends have disagreements. When work is involved, it's best to keep a low profile. Avoid involving other colleagues, and be discreet, however tempting it might be to talk trash or give your former friend the cold shoulder.

"The best solution is to create more distance," Fritz says. "You focus on the task. Try to be civil. But you don't talk about the same things as you did before."

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asap columnist Lisa Singhania is an AP reporter. Do you have a side business in addition to your regular job? E-mail This email address is being protected from spam bots, you need Javascript enabled to view it to discuss.

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